John Holt wrote the following in "How Children Fail." I found this quoted in "Homeschooling with Gentleness" and have seen the same thought echoed elsewhere. He wrote
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So many people say to me, "If we didn't make children do things, they wouldn't do anything." Even worse they say, "If I weren't made to do things, I wouldn't do anything"
It is the creed of a slave.
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That REALLY hit me.
A slave must be forced to do things for no reason other than that the master says it should be done. When our kids were in public school, they were quite literally enslaved to their systems - what kind of pen to use, how many pages to write, the proper way to show your work, when to start, when to stop ... even when to eat and when to pee.
I want our kids to have the opportunity to be more than a little bee in a big hive making nothing of value. The purpose of most mass education is to tame kids into the hive life by convincing them that the experts know what's best for them and training them to respond to bells and rewards. I cannot do that to another human being, much less my own children!
Meanwhile, We have PLENTY of room to learn hard things and do rigorous things in our family. Chores are a great example!! They do sometimes elicit the same level of complaint as Shakespeare used to!! Learning how to get along in a big family is another. Seriously, this is a MAJOR thing!! Learning an instrument or sports skills ALSO qualifies. So does learning from failure. Or managing money or a jillion other real life skills that are never taught via compulsory education.
Today I saw an excellent example of learning hard things – and the motivation and JOY created when the learner does those hard things of their OWN volition.
Neither Gloria nor Natalie has ever taken a gymnastics class. Yet, since beginning homeschooling, they have each spent hours every single day they could be outside perfecting some of their moves – coaching and spotting each other, asking friends who are in gymnastics to coach them, and also poring over instructional videos on YouTube. They will work and work until they “get” something. They can do round-offs, back flips from a dead stand-still, back walkovers, back layouts, aerials and more. Again, just by working really hard at it! They personally own all their success and keep pushing and pushing through failure, bumps and bruises. I APPLAUD their hard work!
